Living Your Incarnation Cross: Devotion to Self, Without Disappearance

In Human Design, there are incarnation crosses that describe a person’s unique life path and purpose. My incarnation cross is the Left Cross of Dedication 2.

I stay with the things I start. I love with boundary and clarity through chaos and calm alike. I am here to be an example of what it looks like to express my interiority while remaining deeply engaged with the world.

I cannot help but express myself but only after I’ve pondered, researched, pontificated, experienced, shared, received feedback, and felt my way through what I could know. Then I speak.

I cannot be convinced of a single perspective. I see from many angles and I work to right-size realizations to the context, the person, or the place I’m in - sometimes all three. My gift is my ability to accept rejection, redirection, and misunderstanding. To make a beautiful offering of devotion from the uncertainty of what comes next that I know I must follow. Resistance is not negative for me. It’s a gentle nudge back toward alignment that I appreciate more than admiration or false niceties.

Commitment doesn’t mean forever, unless it’s made forever through shared connection, decision making or consideration to remain in reciprocity. Commitment means being supported to be in process, in which I remain sovereign in my truth while another remains sovereign in theirs. It means committing to seeing who and what we can become together, while always negotiating whether we continue - and if we depart from our shared vision - how we celebrate and part in a way that closes the energetic loops and major connections.

I know I will say things I didn’t know were true until the moment I say them. Sometimes that surprises me as much as it surprises others.

I digest large data sets, incoherent subtext, and emotional atmospheres. Offering stability and clarity in return.

I curate, taste-make, and sense mood and flow. I only say yes when I am fully lit up and from there I navigate that yes into its next iteration….or into a kind, clear separation when it is no longer a yes.

I understand life as forever change. It is both sides of desire and fear that make up a continual portal moving us closer to our deaths, through inviting us to express what our souls are asking of us as we age. Think less grim reaper, more collaborative adventure guide or participate cause it’s so fun to be guided as well.

Endings do not have to be horror. In my experience the other side of an ending is everything that I was sensing from within that I had no language or context for.

I don’t feel a deep need to be fully understood. I move from what feels true again and again. I know everything will always change and I live to be present of all of the nuances of said changes (and to help others with holding their center as they move through life itself). And still, my essential self, my community, and my creative practice remain. It’s one of my favorite experiences to just be silly, sad, serious - whatever - with my people over the years. It’s always going to be something and I know I can always rely on them to feel with me in the in-between times (and really all the time lol).

My devotion is fueled by patience and by an almost acceptance of the rapid transformation that sometimes feels like everything is happening at once.

I am devoted to the process of being, becoming, and belonging. My gift is knowing that sometimes all I can do is repeat my practices creatively while time passes.

I’m comfortable being experienced as too slow, too fast, too intense, too boring, too confident, too shy, too curious - all at once. Because I can proudly admit I can’t fully understand myself either, can anyone?

I will not dilute myself for anyone’s comfort. And I will attune to meet anyone where they are, as long as they treat me with respect and dignity.

Human Design incarnation crosses have a unique weighted blanket effect for me and others I share with. Isn’t it so goofy that what we each struggle with so privately or in my existence not so privately - is actually the exact thing we are here to offer the world- only in the way we can by ourselves.